Light a candle directly in front of your automatic Glade spray air freshener that way every 9 minutes a fireball shoots across your living room table, intimidating your house guests, asserting your dominance in your domain
I think the fact that two men on Queer Eye have started dating women who were already in their lives should clue men into the fact that there could be women in their lives that care for them deeply and even romantically, and would date them, if they knew that dating wouldn’t include being their fucking mother and teaching them the basics of taking care of themselves as a grown ass adult.
For a second I thought you meant two of the main guys and I got immensely confused
hey no seriously though if you’re in college check your email all the time
i don’t just mean because profs send most important stuff via blackboard and email or whatever
but because it is the most reliable method of getting so much free stuff
the first week of the semester i got an email mentioning you could show up to the dorm common room one evening and get a free succulent guess who has a succulent now
literally this morning i got an email about how apparently it’s my honors college’s 30th birthday and there would be cake in the study suite. like 5 fucking people showed up so they just let us have as much cake as we want, i ate like two pieces and took one home in a tupperware, they also gave me a mug, a lanyard, and like 3 pens i am living like a fucking king
weird bits of your college are willing to feed and furnish you but they only communicate through email, check your email for cake
Maybe this was common knowledge to some folks but I only learned today that koalas have so little cognitive power, they won’t recognize leaves as food if they’re not on a tree branch. They have almost 0 learning capability or problem solving ability.
